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The Walking Dead returns this Sunday, with the premiere of Season 5 at 8pm!  We’ll be screening each episode on the Sundown at Granada rooftop patio every Sunday at 8pm, when they air on AMC.  And this season looks like it’ll be amazing.  We’ll see whether or not Terminus is just another Woodbury.  We’ll see what happens to the group now that they’ve all been reunited/captured.  And While we’re excited to see what kind of mayhem they bring to Terminus for locking them up… We’re more excited to find out answers to questions that have honestly been BURNING INTO OUR MINDS!!

 

Like:

Why are there still so many zombies?

The World is supposed to be some 98% zombie by now, but zombies are living corpses.  So they shouldn’t be able to survive, even with a brain infection, for more than 6 months., tops.  TOPS.  And, since it’s been years since the initial outbreak, how are there so many zombies still walking around, being all zombie!  Atlanta should just be covered with miles of totally-not-a-threat-anymore-because-now-they’re-super-dead zombie bodies.  Yet we keep running into hordes of them.  It would be easier to accept the presence of these hordes if there weren’t whole communities of survivors that the prison group keep running into.  Each of those survivors presumably kills lots of zombies.  The prison group had people killing zombie outside their fences on regular shifts.  Which brings up another thing?

 

How are zombies even a threat to anyone anymore?

Remember that scene where a very sad and haggard Governor was just wandering around the streets dodging zombies like it was no big deal?  That’s because it truly isn’t a big deal.  They’re dumb, and slow from rigor mortis and decaying limbs.  Those are not the qualities of a great predator.    A predator can stalk you, track you, and outrun you.  A good predator isn’t just hungry all of the time.  These things are  just wandering around eating whatever isn’t dead yet (which can’t be much at this point) until their stomachs burst (I’m assuming they don’t have a working digestive system, so their bellies just fill with flesh until they pop open)  That’s how super dumb and braindead they are.  Just eating whatever they see, like morons.  Oh, and did I mention they’re corpses that are slowly falling apart?  Because that begs another question…

 

How do people not know they’re coming?!

Beyond an hunger for flesh, zombies are known for being dead things walking around.  Rotting away every passing day.  Have you ever smelled rotting flesh?  It’s an incredibly strong odor.  You can smell it from yards away.  And it’s distinct.  When something is rotting, it smells dead.  So, since a corpse is what a zombie is, they should smell god awful.  And, as I said earlier, they are bursting with dead flesh that they’ve eaten.  Gross.  They are super gross things.  So, say you walk into a room that looks deceivingly empty, and you’re like “I don’t see any zombies.  Maybe I’m safe?”   Take a big long whiff of the air.  Does it smell like dead stuff is in there?  Yes?  Okay, so then there’s a zombie in there, so leave before one jumps outta something to bite your face off.  Has everyone lost their sense of smell in the show?  Why do they only trust their eyes in a dark room?

 

Maybe this season will finally give us a scene that goes something like this:

Michonne:  You smell that?

Daryl: Yea, it smells like something died.

Michonne: Okay, so that must be a zombie.  Anything dead is a zombie now, so let’s get outta here.

Daryl:  Cool.  Hey, how many zombies have you killed today.

Michonne:  I dunno, like 248.  You?

Daryl:  461, but it’s still early in the morning.

Michonne: K, so what’s your point?

Daryl: Well, before the outbreak, Atlanta had a living population of 447,841 people… And since you and I have been murdering every zombie we see —

Michonne: You mean “every walker we see”?

Daryl:  Yea, whatever.  Anyway, at the rate we’re killing these things, I think we might be nearly done, right?  Since it’s not just us killing zombies?  Since, like, every living person does nothing but kill zombies all day?

Michonne:  Oh yea, I kinda wondered when we’d see an end to them.

Daryl:  Cool, so let’s kill this last one we just smelled in here, and we can start rebuilding in a zombie-less world.

Michonne:  Walker-less.

Daryl:  Whatever!

 

Join us for the free screenings of Season 5 of Walking Dead, 8pm every Sunday at the Sundown rooftop patio.

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